I don’t know why people don’t talk about daily activities as farting. Whether it’s the loud one, or the silent fart that comes out with manipulative, annoying, area scatter power. That one that people will quietly cover their noses first, including the person who farted. In short, it is the person who farted that will first of all say “Na who mess for this place?” Or “whoever that did this kind of a thing enh, God will….”
Ah! They will never complete the ‘punish you’. You want the thunder that is waiting for bad leaders in Nigeria to come out of gym and blow someone’s head?
Some people, especially teachers just love farting around kids. Of course, a pupil or a child can never accuse a teacher of farting. Do you want to go back to your mommy’s womb and stay there for another extra nine months? They will be accusing themselves innocently; covering their noses and saying, “hmm, aunty, koko farted.” Or “aunty, someone just polluted the air, awwweeee…” And the teacher, without the fear of God in her will ask, “who did this nonsense? Don’t you know that farting in public is a sin? Apologize to yourselves now!” And that’s how mma teacher ekpo got herself and her farting ass off. Nkor afid afon se obong anyai?
When I was little, my aunty meme will explode that farting that is like an atomic bomb and expect you to tell her ‘sorry aunty Meme’. But God knows that even when I innocently told her sorry to avoid getting slapped, I used to ask God to make her not to poo for days. I was an ‘eful shild’.
Everyone knows that the fart that comes with thunder and striking is just a noise maker. Ah! It doesn’t have power to explore the air and make people grumble.
The fart that comes out like this ‘feeeeeeeew’ or szzzzzzzzzzzzzz’ is the fart that lands in the air like bomb blast that has been prepared for like ten years; They people who fart this kind of fart are the ones who eat beans, toasted bread with lots of fried eggs, and then come get constipation join. Ahhhhhhh!
If these people truthfully tell you “i ate beans two days ago, I can’t go to toilet.” My dear, don’t you ever go close to them, except you want to have severe stomachache or inhale someone’s shit.
I pity those who fart and not accept that they fart. Especially my classmates in high school. The kind of curses that is on these people’s head enh.
I am done talking about farting, I just want to let y’all know that there is no place for farting. Get yourselves a place when you wanna fart. Stand up and stylishly do as if you want to answer call, then remove the nonsense conformably into the empty air. Whew!