Excerpts from my latest book — The Sexual Minefield.
A woman somehow has the power to send signals to our subconscious, to make us do things. It’s so subtle, it’s unnoticeable, yet it’s undeniable! We see the effects played out often. One look of helplessness and men are falling over themselves to offer assistance. One unverbalized hint that they admire your style and sartorial elegance and a man is ready to run to the moon back and forth on her behalf. One look of dehydration and a man offers to leap over a wall and run through a troop, just to slake her thirst. One loose button off her blouse and a man becomes engorged into libidinous readiness. The influence-power in a woman can still the strongest tsunami in a man to a whisper by simply raising one little finger. Men will do some of the most unimaginable things when they are ambushed and entrapped by the influence-power of a woman.
Influence-power is an intelligent control system. It operates by taking control of the operating system of a host. It then uses the energy of that host to accomplish non-verbal suggestions.
Women who are given to nagging and yelling either don’t understand or appreciate their own power. Nagging is supraliminal enforcement of commands; it is very annoying and counter productive.
Your charms and caresses will win more battles for you as a wife than any complaining or combatting will do. It might seem odd at first, but gentleness and femininity are elixirs for men, irrespective of their status or stature.
An anonymous poet put the following interesting thoughts down: “Whereas male power is hard, aggressive and boastful, female power is soft, passive and self-effacing. Whereas male power is like an irresistible force, female power is like an immovable object. Whereas male power acts like a storm, full of motion, sound and fury, female power is like the sun – steady, quiet and uncontestable.
Against resistance, male power barks, commands and pummels, whereas female power whispers, maneuvers and wins while in total submission without so much as a threat or a tug. Clever women always do this; clever women have always won doing it.” How true! Some men that are ignorant of this fact assume that because a lady is quiet and doesn’t scream out commands that they are weak, but the reverse is the case.
When a man is in charge of an organization; everybody will know because he announces his presence and position, because he wants everyone to know that he is in charge. Position-power is loud.
Unlike position-power, influence-power is dangerous because it’s silent power; when a lady is in an establishment, you may not be able to see her influence with your optical eyes when it’s working, but you will see the results just like the wind. Influence-power has a subtle way of coming into a place to control things and if you are not vigilant it could take over an organization, government or a home, and by the time you realize it, it’s almost too late.
Many of us think that our countries and corporations are actually being ran by the presidents and CEO’s; but not necessarily so. Most of them are regulated by women that is not even a public figure and she doesn’t have to come out publicly to make a policy statement, all she has to do is to act like she is not happy about a decision that is about to be made; and then she might say something like “I am not very comfortable with that decision, I don’t think you should go ahead with it” Gbam! And it becomes a policy right from the comfort of their home.
The woman doesn’t necessarily have to be his wife or girlfriend, she could be his mother, mentor, friend, sister or a confidant that he appreciates and celebrates. It might interest you to know that from studies about 95 percent of all decisions made by men are done under the influence of a woman.
Influence-power is a wonderful gift that was given to women by God for the well being of themselves, family and their communities. Abigail used her influence-power to pacify and prevent David from bringing devastation into her family and community (see1samuel 25:2-35). But women have to also be aware of the flip side of this gift because of its potential for evil as well.
Even Christian women have to bring this gift under the influence of the word of God. We can see a clear example of the corruption of the influence-power in Genesis 3:1-6 when Adam ruined his relationship with God when he submitted to Eve’s influence over the influence of the word of God.
Without trying to absolve him of his responsibility, the point is that Eve’s influence contributed immensely to his wrong choice. In many cases influence-power could be very dangerous and powerful and that is why God needed to put her under the rule and regulation of position-power for her own protection and the protection of others. Genesis 3:16 summarizes this thought. “ To the woman He said……. Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you. See part 3